


Used To This

by MissionBrandt



Category: Mission: Impossible, Mission: Impossible (Movies), mission: impossible rouge nation
Genre: Dirty Talk, Explicit Language, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Minor Injuries, Pain Kink, The last chapter will be the explicit one, Warning: mentions of weight loss, after rouge nation, i got pissed that brandt isn't in M:I 6 and this is the result, mild hypothermia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-27
Updated: 2018-07-26
Packaged: 2018-11-19 13:59:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 17,900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11314869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MissionBrandt/pseuds/MissionBrandt
Summary: Will hasn't spoken to Ethan in six months, since the day Ethan called him from London.Or: What was going through William Brandt's head during and after Rouge Nation.Completed





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is dedicated to Lizzie, Brandon, and Kennedy who deal with my shit on a daily basis and read over this for me. It is significantly better because of you. 
> 
> Also sorry to those I told that this would be ready in 2015 lol. It's here now hope you like it.

**Will’s POV**

Will hasn't spoken to Ethan in six months, since the day Ethan called him from London.

The second Will had gone secure, he could tell by the wild, uncontrolled sound of Ethan’s voice that he had discovered something big, some break in the Syndicate case. When he requested that Brandt look for agents that were missing or presumed dead, Brandt had wanted to say yes. He had wanted with every fiber of his being to drop everything and go look up the information that Ethan needed, even if the IMF was shut down. He had wanted to gather all the gear he could and run.

But Brandt, standing in a hallway feet away from the director of the CIA, knew that wasn’t an option. He knew that Ethan wasn’t going to come in even before the call. After listening to Ethan's almost exhilarated voice, Brandt knew Ethan wouldn’t be caught until he finished the mission. Something had happened, something horrific, to make Ethan sound that way.

Ethan was determined- he had a grudge against someone who had outsmarted him. Brandt knew Ethan would stop at nothing to make sure he was the one who won in the end.

And Brandt knew the part he needed to take on. He needed to go over to the CIA to work immediately next to Hunley and make sure he didn’t get close to finding Ethan.

He cut Ethan off and told him against the lump forming in his throat that he couldn’t do it, that he couldn’t do what Ethan asked. That the committee had shut the IMF down, that he had been ordered to bring anyone in.

Predictably, Ethan told him that they had never had this conversation, that the last thing Brandt heard about him was that he was tracking the Syndicate.

Ethan’s voice changed when he told Will this, and to anyone else, it would have sounded like Ethan was more in control. But Brandt could hear past that — could hear the detached, breathy sound to Ethan’s voice that meant he was injured. It took every bit of willpower Brandt had in him to not ask Ethan right there, feet away from Hunley who was now approaching him, what was hurt. But Brandt, who prided himself on how well he could keep his composure, swallowed thickly and suppressed the fear spreading through him. He told Ethan the only thing he could think to say.

“This may be our last mission, Ethan. Make it count.”

And then he hung up just in time to turn around to meet Hunley, praying to some god that he didn’t believe in that he didn’t just hear Ethan’s voice for the last time. 

There was already worry coursing through him, anxiety settling in his chest and making him shake. But Ethan would be gone until this was finished — Will was sure of that. He would have been lying to himself if he thought the feeling would fade before Ethan was safe, so he supposed he better get used to it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Will’s POV**

Now- six months later and standing in a CIA operation room- Brandt is fighting the urge to throw up right on Hunley’s shoes. His hands are sweaty where they rest at his sides and he’s shaking- it’s just a tremble, not noticeable to anyone else, but he is. He’s always careful to not show his panic, but in this situation, that means all he can do is concentrate on keeping himself faux-calm.

He stares up at the huge screens at the front of the room and watches several cars full of CIA agents with fully loaded guns pull up outside the building that is supposedly Ethan Hunt’s current residence. For the past six months, Brandt has been able to discreetly keep the CIA off of Ethan’s trail just long enough so that Ethan was gone when they arrived, but as he’s vastly outnumbered, he was bound to run out of luck, and he’s terrified that this is the end.

Some young guy that Will now hates pinpointed Ethan’s position five hours ago now, and so here they all are, watching the screen with rapt attention, all but Will hoping that Ethan is still there. Will has racked his brain over and over for an idea on how to help Ethan, but he’s stuck. He obviously can’t get in touch with Ethan, there is no stopping the CIA now, and Luther won’t pick up his fucking phone that Will has called at least ten times today.

So here he is, fighting to keep himself indifferent despite being more scared than he can remember being in a long time as the men rush their way into the building and up the stairs. He finds himself praying once again to that god he doesn’t believe in that he’s not about to watch a bullet go through Ethan’s head.

The men reach the top floor and Will’s stomach drops to his feet as the sound of a man’s rough, heavy breathing reaches his ears. He feels his own breath stop. The men pause for just a moment before they crash to the door, and Brandt wants to scream, wants to do anything to keep them from hurting Ethan. They turn to the right first before swinging to the left, and Brandt clenches his hands to prepare himself to see —

No one.

Absolutely no one.

Relief rushes through him so fast he gets light headed with it. He takes a deep breath, noticing only now how his body was screaming at him for air. He unclenches his fists and flexes his prickling fingers, willing the blood to rush back in. Swallowing thickly and clearing his throat, he presses down the communication button and asks the men to face the map.

Will barely remembers the next few hours. He finishes his work as fast as he can, but it still takes hours with all the stuff Ethan left behind. He’s on autopilot and he knows it, but adrenaline and anxiety are still coursing through him, and he’s unable to calm down with everyone else around. Finally, well past ten at night, he’s able to rush out and drive home, and it’s a miracle that he doesn’t cause a crash. He takes the stairs up to his apartment in twos, fumbling with his keys because his hands have started shaking again. He slams the door shut behind him and throws on the deadbolt before putting his back to the door, sliding down it quickly, and collapsing in a heap on the floor.

His whole body is shaking — actually, properly shaking — as he pulls his knees to his chest and wraps his arms around them. He rests his head down on his knees and tries to pull himself together, tries to convince himself he’s overreacting. Ethan is safe, he’s not dead. But it was so _so_ close. Sure, the CIA would have probably only captured him, but Will still thought he was going to watch Ethan Hunt die, and the tears sneak up on him, squeezing out from behind his closed eyes and running hot down his cheeks.

He opens his mouth to take a deep breath and gather himself, but the next second he’s sobbing. There are too many emotions running through him right now for him to handle and he can’t hold it back anymore. He’s sobbing out of relief that Ethan is still free and hopefully alive, from the fear and anxiety that have been coursing through him for almost ten hours now. Sobbing from six months of pent up worry and frustration, six months of no sleep and no appetite and lost weight. Sobbing from the hurt in his chest that refuses to go away for even a moment. Sobbing from missing Ethan. 

As he sits there shaking and sobbing, he knows he can’t deny it anymore. He’s spent the past year and a half lying to himself, convincing himself that his feelings for Ethan Hunt are purely platonic. But Will is an analyst at heart, and he knows that if his feelings were just platonic he wouldn’t be this worried about Ethan. Ethan is the best at what he does, he’s not going to get caught. And Brandt knows that. He does. But he still can’t make himself stop worrying constantly, and it’s time to admit the reason why to himself.

He is completely, head over heels in love with Ethan Hunt. 

He should have known it was going to happen, but he missed himself falling until one day, about a year ago now, when he caught himself getting butterflies in his stomach when Ethan flashed that insanely bright smile in his direction. He immediately shut the feeling down, blaming it on how tired he was at the time. But the feeling never went away, so here Will is, sitting against his apartment door crying pathetically because he can’t get over it.

He cries until he can’t cry anymore, until all the tears are gone and he’s just dry heaving. He gets unsteadily to his feet, using the wall for support as he forces himself to make it to the bedroom and strip down to his boxers and plug in his phone.

He lands heavily on his bed, pulling the thrown aside sheet from that morning back around him. He’s so exhausted, so absolutely drained that he can’t keep his eyes open. But he knows sleep won’t come until dawn.

And it doesn’t, so Will falls asleep just three hours before he has to be up again for the 183rd day in a row.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Visit/chat with me on Tumblr! My url is MissionBrandt :)
> 
> Please please leave comments and tell me what you think! I would love to hear from you guys.


	3. Chapter 3

**Will’s POV**

Vienna happens fast.

It’s Saturday and slow like it always is. Will has once again been called in, just like every other weekend since he started working for the CIA.

He would really like to use the weekends to catch up on all the sleep he hasn’t gotten over the past several months. He can only sleep when the sun is up, so being able to sleep both days would help tremendously.

Unfortunately, he hasn’t been able to use that time constructively for the whole six months he’s worked under Hunley, who feels that he constantly needs to have an eye on Will, even if that eye is someone else babysitting him on the weekends while Hunley stays home. Needing to stay awake, Will has turned to caffeine. Some days it’s the pills, other’s it’s a five hour energy, others it’s way too much coffee. He knows it’s unhealthy, but he also knows when to stop taking it to avoid hurting himself. He can sleep in the on call rooms here at the office on the weekends when it’s slow, and he does, but it’s never very satisfying. Occasionally, Benji will stay overnight with him at the office and sleep in the on-call room, so that Will can get some rest. He always asks Will to stay so that he can actually get some sleep, but Will can tell Benji is doing it for him.

Because getting no sleep isn’t enough apparently, Brandt also has zero appetite. He forces himself to eat three meals a day, but he hates the taste of everything. He knows he needs it to be healthy, so he eats, even if it’s not much. But despite his efforts, he’s still dropped two sizes, and while not noticeable with his suit on, it is when his shirt is off. It’s a good thing that he never has to have his shirt off at work.

It’s approaching two in the afternoon when the news hits. The Chancellor of Austria and his wife have been killed by a car bomb after the Chancellor had been shot in the arm at the Vienna Opera. It was only a flesh wound. There was an attempt to take him to the hospital but it was in vain. The car was in front of the Opera House when it blew.

Brandt is looking up at the footage of the burning car in shock when Hunley bursts into the room and confirms his fears — Ethan was at the Opera that night. Ethan _and_  Benji. Brandt is ashamed of the feeling of jealousy that bubbles in his throat at the thought that Ethan called Benji over him.

Hunley clearly has had enough — this has pushed him over a line that he can't come back to the other side of. He no longer cares if he catches Ethan or not, he just wants him off the streets. Will feels the world drop out under his feet when Hunley tells him he gave the Special Activities Unit permission to shoot to kill.

His head is still spinning when he gets out of the car to greet Luther, whom he had called the second he got out of work. Luther is reluctant to help him, saying all he knows about Brandt is that he chose to work for the CIA, like doing so is betraying Ethan.

Will wants to scream at him for that- how can Luther not see that he’s working at the CIA _for_ Ethan? Doesn’t he understand that Brandt is leaving that job now because it is no longer helpful to be there _for_ Ethan? Will hasn’t seen Ethan in six months — hasn’t attempted to contact him, hasn’t been contacted by him. He knows he could find Ethan, he knows he could have left and went to be with him. But he stayed at the CIA because that is where he needed to be _for_ Ethan.

He needs Luther’s help, though, and staying calm and telling Luther what he wants to hear is the only way to get it. He convinces Luther to help him by telling him the truth — that if the CIA found Ethan and Benji, they were going to kill them.

Luther, despite his lack of emotional intelligence, is a genius, so he looks for the woman instead of Ethan or Benji. “He trusts her,” Luther tells him, that's why finding her will find Ethan. Brandt feels the jealousy bubbling up in his throat again at the words. He swallows down against it like he did earlier and turns away from Luther, telling himself he has no right to feel that way. He nods at Hunley when he looks up at him.

Luther finds her in a matter of seconds- Ilsa Faust, former British Intelligence, disavowed, currently in Morocco. Will hates her.

Luther has them on a plane an hour later. Will settles into his seat next to Luther’s, tries to get comfortable in the old leather seat. It’s twenty minutes after takeoff when Luther speaks to Will again, looking straight ahead.

“I understand you were working at the CIA to help Ethan. I’m sorry I crossed that line.”

“And I understand your concern for it,” Will admits, looking straight ahead as well. “There’s no need to apologize.”

Luther nods once. It’s a moment before he speaks again.

“You look like you haven’t slept since he disappeared.”

Will, caught off guard by the comment, tries to think of something to say, something to cover up that it’s true. But as Luther isn’t six months sleep deprived, he beats Brandt to it.

“It’s true, isn’t it? You haven’t actually slept a full night since Ethan went off the grid.” He doesn’t even give Will time to confirm that before he pushes on. “I found the caffeine pills by the way, in your bag.”

Will glares over at him, and then down at his bag. He reaches in the pocket where he keeps the pills. They’re gone.

“And I took them and threw them out at the airport so you can’t take any more,” Luther explains.

Will splutters at him for a moment, anger coursing through him. “I need them to stay awake!” he snaps. “We need to find Ethan and Benji; I need to stay alert!”

“You’ve got an eight hour flight to sleep. I brought you Ambien,” Luther counters, perfectly calm. He pulls a small package of pills out of his inside jacket pocket and offers them to Will. “Take one and sleep during the flight.”

Will takes the pills from Luther’s hand bitterly, feeling that they are some kind of peace offering, even though he can't take them. Ambien makes him way too drowsy.  He closes his eyes and draws a few breaths harshly through his nose, willing himself to calm down.

“I appreciate this,” Will says tightly, gesturing towards the packet of pills now in his hand, “But why did you throw the caffeine ones away? I might still need them to help!”

Luther turns suddenly to look him in the eyes, and Will moves back in his chair as if burned by the glare. “Because Ethan wouldn’t want you to be taking them, and you damn well know that,” he says seriously. Will feels like a child being scolded, but refuses to drop his gaze. “He hates caffeine pills, he literally _preaches_ about how bad they are for you. He only ever lets anyone on his team take one in a worst case scenario; it’s always been that way. And you’ve been taking them _regularly every day_. He’s going to have a fit when I tell him.”

“It is not every day!” Will spits back, defending himself. “I followed the directions on the bottle. And you can’t tell Ethan, he’ll flip.”

“You’re damn right he will, and for good reason.”

“Luther, please,” Will forces the words past his lips, hating the way they taste on his tongue — he can’t stand begging people. But Ethan can’t know that he isn’t sleeping; Will can almost see it now: Ethan would take one look at him and his secret would be out. He would know Will is too much an analyst not to have gone over the situation a thousand times. He would know that Will knew the chances of Ethan getting captured by the CIA are close to none, and that Will should have no reason to be so worried. One second later Ethan would have it all figured out: the worry, the loss of weight, the sleepless nights- they make no sense if Will doesn't love Ethan. As it stands, Will is practically a poster boy for a lovesick army husband. He takes a deep breath, trying not to loose his temper with Luther, “Don’t —”

“Maybe if you take the Ambien and go to sleep I’ll think about it.” Luther tells him, cutting him off settling back into his chair.

“I can’t take them.” Will admits. “I get a horrible hangover from them. I won’t fully wake up for fifteen hours, no matter what you do to try and wake me.”

“Fine, then go to sleep without them them.” Luther shoots back, “You’ve got plenty of time.”

They lapse into silence for several minutes, Will starting to feel drowsy when Luther speaks again.

“You’re an analyst,” he starts, and Will feels his stomach drop. Luther sees the holes in it too. “Ethan always talked about it — how you overthink things. You understand the situation- you know Ethan isn’t going to get caught. You know he knows what he’s doing. So how come you’re so worried about him that you have lost sleep and weight—”

Will opens his mouth to argue about his weight, trying to get Luther off the subject, but Luther holds his hand up to cut Will off, “— yes, you have lost weight, and if it’s noticeable to me, you can bet your ass Ethan is going to notice, and there’s nothing I can do to stop him from seeing that.”

Will thinks for a moment that he’s succeeded anyway, but he has no such luck. 

“Back to my point,” Luther persists. Will can feel the back of his neck break out in a nervous sweat. “You _know_ that Ethan is more than capable of what he is doing, you _know_ he is smarter than the CIA. You have gone over the situation a thousand times in your head, it’s what you do. So why are you so worried about him if you know what he’s capable of?”

Will’s cheeks burn red with embarrassment. He continues to look straight ahead at the seat in front of him. He can feel Luther looking at him, expecting an answer. His hands are clammy where they sit in his lap. He’s breathing fast, trying to come up with an answer that would pass as real and hide the truth.

Will obviously knows the answer. He feels sick with himself every time he thinks about it, every time he feels the jealously swell in his chest like it did when he looked at Ilsa. He knows he has no right to feel the way he does. It’s wrong and unprofessional.

He’s taking too long and he knows it. Luther is still staring at him determinedly, but Will’s head is spinning. He’s too nervous (and tired) to think straight, he can’t come up with anything that would work. He’s giving it away as he sits there saying nothing; he might as well stand up and scream it to the whole cabin.

But Luther is being patient with him, not giving up but not pushing Will to say anything either, giving him time to think of something to cover it up.

And that’s when Will realizes that Luther already knows.

Luther knew it when he started the conversation by apologizing; this was the point of the whole thing. He knows Will’s dark secret. He just wants to hear Will say it himself.

Luther apparently can tell by his face that Will has figured it out. Out of the corner of his eye, Will sees Luther’s gaze change to something marginally softer. It makes Will want to punch him.

“You love him, don’t you?” Luther asks him, though Will knows it isn’t really a question.

Will squeezes his eyes shut and clenches his hands into fists, trying to keep them from shaking. He can’t bring himself to deny it, to shake his head and laugh and call Luther crazy. But he can’t find the courage to look at Luther and admit it either.

After several long moments, Luther sighs heavily and turns to face forward in his seat, leaving Will to deal with his inner turmoil. Will stays in the same position for some time after that, unable to let the conversation pass but not able to speak up and end it.

“I won’t tell him,” Luther finally says, breaking the silence between them and making Will jump in his seat. “It’s your business, not mine. But I will tell him about the caffeine pills if you don’t go to sleep, so I suggest you get on that.”

Will lets out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and tries to find his voice to say thank you, but ends up just nodding, hoping Luther takes it as the thank you Will means for it to be. He takes a deep breath and reclines his seat as much as he can, closing his eyes and trying to get his mind to shut up. Soon, six months of exhaustion take him over. He’s asleep not even ten minutes later.


	4. Chapter 4

**Will’s POV**

Seven hours later, Luther shakes Will awake after the plane has landed. It takes Will 15 minutes to completely shake off the sleepy haze, but when he has, he feels better than he can remember feeling in a long time.

“We should get something fast,” Will tells Luther as they look through the rental cars. “How about this one?” He points to an Audi RS 7. “Luther?”

Luther is already climbing into the passenger side of a Jeep.

“Luther, no. We should take something fast. As in not a Jeep."

"You got something against Jeeps?"

"Aside from them being shitty and slow, no."

"Shitty? Does your Audi have four-wheel drive? Can your Audi drive off road? No? Didn't think so. Get in the car."

Will shakes his head and rolls his eyes but walks over to the Jeep, throwing his bag in the back and climbing in.

“I thought you said you could find them?” Will asks him as he drives through Casablanca some time later.

“I said I could locate them. You have to find them.”

Will rolls his eyes. “Right.”

“No, turn left.”

“No, not like that. I was saying ‘right’ in response to you.”

“Ok, right.”

“Now turn right? You said turn left.”

“No.”

“No what? Am I turning right or left?”

“Left.”

“Then why did you say right?”

“I was saying right in response to you.”

“Right.”

"No left.”

"No, I mean— you know what, forget it."

Will turns left and they drive in silence to the sound of the face locator working away on Luther's computer.

"Take your next left."

"Right."

"Just don't," Luther tells him and Will laughs.

"Glad to know you're feeling better,” Luther comments, a hint of sarcasm in his voice as he hands Will a snack bar. “Eat this."

"What is it?"

"It's a protein bar. One that is particularly good at helping people gain weight. Don't scrunch your nose at it," Luther scolds him, "there are far more disgusting ones. Try it."

Will bites into it and has to admit it isn’t half bad. He’s pretty hungry anyway. He ignores Luther's smirk as he takes the second one and starts on it. He ends up eating all five in the box.

"You'll take the next left up there."

"Right"

" _Don't_."

"All right, all right. Calm down. Woah!"

Will slams on the brakes as a bike zooms out of an alley in front of him, jolting both of them forward. The car barely doesn't hit the biker.

Luther has no time to respond before a silver car zooms out of the alley too fast, drifts, and smashes into the parked car on the other side of the street.

Ethan and Benji are in it.

They all sit there for a moment, just staring at each other, trying to figure out if what they are seeing is true. Will, stunned and exasperated, nods at Ethan, who waves back quickly before taking off again. He can't make himself shut his mouth.

"Found ‘em," Will supplies, too stunned to say anything but the obvious, and starts to turn the car around as several more bikes zoom out and around them.

“Oh, come on, man!” Luther complains.

“Shit!” Will screams as he tries to turn the car around. "That’s a high speed chase! You just had to have the four-by-four, didn’t you!"

“Hey look, don’t blame me. You chose it!" Luther argues back, the liar. 

"You just had to have it!" he screams again as he manages to turn the car around and starts after Ethan.

"Do you want me to drive? Look at this. Look how slow you're going, speed it up!"

He zooms in Ethan's direction but they’ve already lost them.

"Go around that way!" Luther tells him, looking only at a map now.

Will makes the turn and speeds up again, turning when Luther tells him to.

"There!" Luther points ahead of them. Will was expecting to see Ethan’s car zooming around a corner. It’s not the sight that greets him.

The silver car is zooming backwards through the air.

"Shit! What the fuck, Ethan!" he shouts.

"That ain't gonna end well!" Luther screams back.

He steps on the gas as the silver car lands on its back end. It does three flips and lands harshly upside-down, the front end hitting the ground first before sliding several more feet.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" Will chants as his stomach turns to knots. "Fuck, what were you thinking, Ethan!"

"Black bike pulling up!" Luther points out as they rapidly approach the silver car. Will looks over in time to see the rider get off and pull out a gun.

"FUCK!"

He speeds up even more, flying into the parking lot and slamming on the breaks five feet away from the biker, hitting him and sending him flying, probably killing him. Will can't bring himself to care.

He flies out of the car, leaving the door open behind him as he falls to his knees beside Ethan's window. He could cry from relief when he sees Ethan alive. And Benji. Who is also alive, but unconscious.

"You good?" he asks Ethan, the only thing he can force himself to say without breaking into tears.

"Things-" Ethan lingers on the word for a moment, trying to find the right way to phrase what he wants to say, "-got a little out of hand."

Will nods again, (and jumps a bit when Benji wakes up and screams “AH! LOOK OUT!”) not trusting himself to speak. It has been so long since he heard that voice- it is music to his ears, one of the most beautiful things he’s ever heard (despite Will trying to ignore that it is).

He pulls Ethan out of the car and helps him to stand up. It feels amazing to have his hands on Ethan, to actually feel that he’s alive and (mostly) unhurt. He wants to hang on forever— to wrap his arms around Ethan's middle and hold him, let Ethan hold him back and tell him it’s going to be okay.

Instead, because Will does have some sanity left, he asks Ethan if he’s good and then goes to help Luther with Benji. There will be time to talk to Ethan later at the safe house, when Will has a better grip on his self-control.

Before he can even get started on cutting Benji loose, he hears the bike's engine start again. He stands up just in time to see Ethan zooming away on it after another bike.

In other words- Will has spent six months longing to see Ethan, and less than five minutes after he finally gets to him, he’s lost him all over again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Visit/chat with me on Tumblr! My url is MissionBrandt :)
> 
> Please please leave comments and tell me what you think! I would love to hear from you guys.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will hasn't spoken to Ethan in six months, since the day Ethan called him from London.
> 
> Or: What was going through William Brandt's head during and after Rouge Nation.
> 
> There will be 14 chapters, all are completed already.

Chapter 5

**Benji’s POV**

"He looks like shit," Benji whispers to Luther over the small table in between them on the plane to London. Ethan had somehow got them on a private jet that neither took off, nor will it land in an airport, which is a gift straight from god. Will is sleeping several rows up and Ethan is working several rows back.

"Which one?" Luther whispers back, "They both look horrible."

"True," Benji agrees, "but Brandt looks worse."

"If Ethan hadn't shown back up, he would look much, much worse. So I'm willing to settle for this."

Ethan had somehow beat them back to the cafe they had designated as the rendezvous point before the mission, because he's Ethan. Benji is pretty sure it's the only reason Brandt didn't start crying earlier.

"Look," Luther says, leaning back in his seat. "He's sleeping, that's what matters. He’ll get a couple more hours here, and then he’ll actually be ready to go for London."

Benji shakes his head, "I wish I could have done more. At Langley. I only got the chance to see him once in awhile with Hunley watching both of us. Every time I passed him, he looked worse. If I could have stayed with him outside of work, he would have actually slept. Sometimes we stayed at work, but I was afraid Hunley would get suspicious. I should have just done it anyway—"

"No, you shouldn't have," Luther cuts in, "You both would have found yourselves in prison. As long as we’re able to finish this, Will should go back to normal."

Benji snorts, shaking his head. "I wish I believed you. I don't know if Will is going to let himself stay on this team, if this goes right."

They lapse into silence, Benji staring back at Ethan where he sits, buried in his investigation. Benji shakes his head at him.

"Obviously, he's got this right. Ethan." Benji starts again, looking back at Luther, "and he'll find a way, like he always does. But how doesn’t he notice how bad Brandt looks? I mean, he looks horrible! How do you miss that?"

"Ethan tends to miss things when he's focused on a goal," Luther answers solemnly. "You've witnessed it. He zooms in on it and the little things around him go unnoticed. The second this all stops, though, everything will come back into focus, and he'll start asking when this happened and when that happened. It's not his best habit."

Benji groans. "I just hope we can end this," he admits, drumming his fingers on the table. "I don't want to think about what will happen to both of them if it doesn't."

Luther grunts darkly in agreement. It's silent for a few moments again, before Luther asks, so quietly Benji almost doesn't hear him, "Do you know?"

It should be so unspecific that Benji couldn't possibly have any idea as to what Luther is referring to, but by the way he says it, Benji knows exactly what he's talking about. He nods, looking Luther in the eye.

"How Will feels about —" he breaks off, jerking his head toward Ethan. Luther nods, and Benji sighs. "Yeah, I know."

"Does Ethan —"

"No, he doesn't know. I don't think so."

Luther nods, looking back out the window. The heavy silence sticks this time, and Benji stares over at Ethan as he works until his eyes grow tired and he closes them, wondering what would happen if he knew.


	6. Chapter 6

**Will’s POV**

So. When they try to open the ledger, it turns out to be a Red Box. Which means that the Prime Minister of Britain is the only person on the face of the earth that can open it. Which means that Solomon Lane has a plan to take the Prime Minister to open the ledger. And Ethan doesn’t fucking want to warn the British Government. Which means Will and Ethan are currently fighting.

It hurts to have Ethan screaming at him before they’ve had a real conversation, but Will’s not going to stand down just because of that. It doesn’t help that Luther jumps in to defend Ethan, like Will is the one being unreasonable here. But, as always, Ethan wins after getting in his face and Will gives in, defeated. He shakes his head, too tired to keep fighting, the hurt in his chest throbbing too much for him to continue despite having a horrible feeling about it all. Forty-five minutes later, Ethan and Will are chasing after a car that has Benji in its trunk.

And Ethan is  _still_ fucking defending Ilsa.

Will has spent the past six months working day and night to help Ethan, never going behind his back or betraying him. Yet he’s the one Ethan’s anger is directed at as Will points out that Ilsa set them up, even though this woman just caused Benji to be captured by Lane.

He takes a deep breath and tries to keep control of himself as Ethan talks to Lane about what to do to get Benji back, and he has to turn his back to Ethan and Luther for a moment because Luther’s giving him an apologetic look of sympathy, and Will can’t handle that right now.

Lane wants the disk unlocked by midnight, which means they have to take the Prime Minister, and when Will asks Ethan to think about that one for a minute, he gets Ethan walking towards him with a crazy look in his eyes asking Will if he “sees how this is the way they beat Lane”.

Will wonders if the Ethan he used to know, the Ethan he’s in love with, will ever exist again.

Ethan apparently doesn’t have time to ask Will how he’s been, but he does have time to ask Will, without so much as a second thought, to go against every moral code in his body and help take the British Prime Minister by calling Hunley and pretending to betray Ethan. He does it, because he can’t say no to any version of Ethan Hunt, no matter how he treats Will.

“You good?” Luther asks him a couple minutes later after Will walks back in from making the call to Hunley. Will knows he’s not asking about the mission, but Ethan’s right there, so Luther’s lost his damn mind if he thinks that Will’s going to talk about that right now. 

“Yeah.” He breathes out, picking up a bag and turning to face Luther. “We’re supposed to take down the Prime Minister tonight, so-“ he responds, turning away from Luther and starting to walk away when his face turns from concerned to annoyed at Will’s deflection of his real question. 

Will doesn’t know what the hell Luther was expecting-  he’s obviously not okay about the whole Ethan situation right now, but he’s sure as hell not going to talk about it here- they’ve got too much to worry about and Ethan is literally  _in the room_. Will thinks he’s escaped the conversation and is happy to head towards the door when Ethan speaks up and he stops in his tracks. 

“Brandt.” He says, his voice surprisingly not harsh. Brandt, caught off guard, doesn’t know what to say, so he just stands there staring at Ethan, waiting for him to go on. 

“I can’t see another way.” Ethan says slowly but sincerely, looking up at Will and waiting for a response.

“Neither can I,” Will says after a moment, looking away from Ethan- he can’t do this right now. “But we do what we have to do for our friends, right?'

Ethan looks marginally concerned but he nods, tries to smile softly at Will but Will is already walking away. Of course he can’t see another way  _now_ , Lane has Benji and he’ll do whatever it takes to get him back. Two hours ago, however, he did see another way. There’s no point in bringing it up though- Ethan will just start yelling at him again. So he lets it go and let’s Ethan win, same as always. 

The plan goes as smoothly as it possibly can, and Will has to admit he takes pleasure in seeing Hunley proved wrong about the Syndicate, and Ethan. Soon, Will and Ethan are headed to the parking garage where Luther is waiting. They are rapidly running out of time to save Benji, and Ethan needs to pick up the disk and go. But Will can’t help the question that slips through his lips.

“And what happens Ethan,” he starts, “if you can’t make it back?”

Everything slows down for a moment, and Ethan looks him dead in the eye for the first time since they’ve been back together.

“I’ll make it back. Just be ready,” he assures Will, voice confident and steady with no room for doubt. Will just nods back and gets to work.

Will and Luther, and Benji once he joins them, barely have enough time to get the box ready before Ethan, bleeding and bruised, is falling through a hole in the ceiling, closely followed by Lane. Will can tell Ethan’s hurt by the way he holds his leg up when he lands.

A minute later, Solomon Lane is unconscious inside the glass box, and when Will looks over at Ethan and sees Ilsa standing behind him, his chest throbs unpleasantly. He ignores it and gets to work on getting the box into the police truck.

He takes the seat between Luther and Benji in the truck, wishing he had something else to concentrate on beside the hurt in his chest as he looks down at his hands. He looks up at Ethan to see what’s taking him so damn long just in time to see him hug Ilsa, pulling her close and holding her there while they whisper in each other’s ears. He accidentally takes in a sharp breath that draws both Benji’s and Luther’s attention to him and immediately looks down again.

He’s spent the past six months wishing to see Ethan, and now he can’t stand being by him. All he wants is to be back in Virginia where he can go home and finally, _finally_  get some sleep, knowing that Ethan is safe.


	7. Chapter 7

**Will’s POV**

It’s a whirlwind when they get back to Langley. They’ve all got post-op procedure to go through, which takes several hours on its own with all the paperwork and check-ups. Benji texts him, asking to meet for lunch, but Will has to decline because Hunley asks him to come help lay out the plan to reinstate the IMF. It takes three days before they head in to talk to the board, and then another week after that.

Will doesn’t have a ton of time to sleep, so he just stays at Langley to take naps in between all the commotion, which actually works out a lot better than he expects. He doesn’t need any caffeine pills, and only drinks three five hour energys (even though he drinks an unbelievable amount of coffee). Still, he feels better and more alert than he has in months, despite the pain that has taken up permanent residence in his chest. It's different from before- it's not worry anymore, but sadness.

He’s only seen Benji once in passing, and he hasn’t seen Luther or Ethan at all over the past week and a half. When it all winds down and Will can finally go back home, he takes a shower and passes out in bed. He sleeps soundly and wakes up fifteen hours later. With the worst cold of his life.

Will calls in sick to work for three days straight because he can’t fucking breathe or keep his eyes open. Benji busts in on Will and mothers him for two of those days. Will tells him to go home so he doesn’t get sick a million times, and even though Benji ignores him, Will definitely appreciates the constant supply of soup and not having to move at all.

“So,” Benji starts during the second afternoon he is there as they sit in the living room with the TV on, “while you can’t run away from me. I know I couldn’t have done anything about it, but I’m sorry for the way Ethan treated you in London. It was shitty of him.”

“Benji-” Will groans, rubbing at his temples. He never wants to talk about this.

“No, shut up,” Benji cuts him off. “It was shitty. And he has yet to stop being shitty, and you should know that it’s not just you seeing that.”

“He’s probably busy too— ”

“Doesn’t excuse it. Moving on, we need to discuss the fact that you are in love with him.”

Will shoots up at that, then almost falls over because his sick head can’t handle the fast movement. He's still seeing stars when he starts talking.

“ _How do you know?_ ” he hisses, heart pounding. “Did Luther tell you? Who else knows about— ”

“Whoa! Whoa, whoa,” Benji cries, holding up his hands, “Calm down! I guessed a long time ago, Will, before you told Luther. And no one else knows, least of all Ethan.”

Will shakes his head and tries to calm down. He scrubs his hands over his face and take a couple of very deep breathes and wills the pounding in his head to go away.

“Look, Will,” Benji says, a serious note to his voice that isn’t there very often. “You can’t be mad at yourself because you have feelings for someone; it’s not something you can control. And it’s good that Luther and I know, because if you need it you can talk to us, especially on missions.”

Will sighs out heavily and looks over at Benji. “Look, Benji. I really appreciate it, I do. But this is something that I need to get over, Ethan would never— ”

“You don’t know that.” Benji cuts him off again. “And I actually think he might return your feelings if— ”

“Benji, no,” Will interrupts, voice hard. He's not going to entertain himself with fantasies.“It wouldn’t work, ok? I just need to get over it, which I’ll be able to do now that I know he’s safe.”

“I think you should try,” Benji declares, then holds up his hands as Will opens his mouth. “But fine. If getting over him is what you want to do, I’ll do what I can to help. You are not, however, allowed to leave this team.”

Will laughs a bit at that as he lies back down on the couch. “Fine, deal.”

“Good.” Benji nods, then they both turn their attention back to the screen.


	8. Chapter 8

**Will’s POV**

It’s a week after Will’s cold finally ends that Will sees Ethan for the first time since they arrived home. The hurt in his chest has faded to a dull ache, and Will is starting to think that he might actually get over Ethan in a timely fashion.

That is, Will thinks he’ll get over Ethan in a timely fashion _before_ Ethan slides into the chair across from him as Will is eating lunch in the building café.

Will looks up from the newspaper he’s reading, expecting to see Benji, who has taken to meeting Will for lunch here. Instead, he’s greeted with the sight of Ethan’s soft, closed lip smile, and Will’s heart is immediately in his throat.

Ethan is wearing a soft grey v-cut shirt with white three-quarter sleeves and dark jeans, his hair shorter than it was in London but still long enough that it needs a bit of product to stay out of his face. He’s freshly shaved and just cleaned up in general, looking much better than he did when Will last saw him.

In short, Will is fucked.

“Hi,” Ethan offers when Will doesn’t say anything. His voice is soft and smooth, a version of his voice that Will hasn’t heard since before Ethan disappeared.

“Hi,” Will responds after another moment, sitting up in his chair. He wants to cringe at how it kind of sounds like a question, as if Will is confused about why Ethan would be talking to him. Which he definitely is, but he doesn’t need Ethan to know that.

Ethan’s smile falters for a fraction of a second, but he recovers fast, leaning forward on his arms towards Will. “How are you? I haven’t seen you at all since we got back from London.”

“I’m good,” Will responds, cursing himself at how he still sounds confused. “How are you?”

“I’m a lot better. I didn’t realize how much those six months on the run had gotten to me until I got back here.”

“I’m glad you’re feeling better,” Will answers honestly.

“Thank you,” Ethan says, offering Will a small smile. “And you? I heard you were sick; are you feeling better?”

“Oh yeah, I’m fine. It was just a cold.”

“Oh, that’s good.” Ethan nods, before his expression turns more serious. “Look, Will—” Ethan starts again, and Will’s stomach drops to his feet. Oh god, does he know? Why is he suddenly so serious? God, what is Will going to do, if Ethan asks him about—

“I wanted to say I’m sorry.” Ethan says, which shuts Will’s mind up. What? “I didn’t understand how hard Hunley was on you these past six months. Regardless, I should have thanked you right away, for staying there and then coming to me. I know they would have found me quicker if it weren’t for you. And then I asked you to do something completely against your code, and never thanked you for that either. So, thank you. For helping me do this. I couldn’t have done it without you.”

Will takes several moments to respond, stunned. “Yeah,” he says, nodding. “Yeah, it’s good. It was no problem.” Which is a lie, because it was, but what else is he supposed to say? “I mean, you were right in the end, and I wasn’t. You saved Benji and the IMF.”

Ethan’s face falls and he shakes his head. “No, Will that’s—that’s not the point.” Ethan says, and he sounds sad. “You weren’t wrong; you just were trying to see another way. And I couldn’t have saved Benji or the IMF without you. I needed you for that.”

Will laughs a bit, looking down at his hands. “Nah, you would have found another way. You’re you, after all.”

Ethan seems stunned by Will’s response, and he’s shaking his head. “No, Will. I don’t think I would have. But that’s not the point— The point is that you helped me do this, and I haven’t thanked you yet, and that’s shitty of me. I’m sorry for that, and thank you. For everything these past six months.”

Will nods, accepting the apology and the gratitude. “You’re welcome,” he eventually says, meeting Ethan’s eye.

Ethan studies him for a moment before nodding. “Good, okay,” he says, swallowing and settling back in his chair. “So- , Benji, Luther, and I were thinking of getting dinner on Friday. You should join us, we’ll leave from here.”

Will is hesitant to go, and originally he tells Ethan maybe, but he ends up going, and even having fun, even though Benji practically drags him there.

After that night, things get pretty much back to normal. When the IMF moves back into its own newly renovated building, the four of them get their own space. They are calling them “Collaborative team work spaces,” and they are open concept, so they’ve got tons of space but no actual offices. Other teams have to share workspaces, but theirs is private, literally on its own floor. It even has a loft. Will kind of likes it, despite thinking he won’t at first. Benji loses it when he sees all the new technology he gets to play with, and Ethan loses it when he sees the view. It’s obvious they are being rewarded for the Syndicate mission.

Three weeks later, they finally get offered their first mission. Will thinks Hunley was doing his best to give them a break, but all the other teams have their own missions at this point, so they are the only option.

It’s a relatively easy mission- just get information out of a billionaire in Greenland about something being built secretively out in the North-East of the country outside of Daneborg. It could turn into something more interesting, but probably not.

They accept it almost immediately, all of them crawling out of their skins from boredom. Three hours later, they are on a plane to Nuuk, Greenland, looking over floorplans, determining paths of action, and identifying targets.

Will was worried about allowing himself to work with Ethan again. There’s still an ache in his chest, but it’s not prominent or sharp like it used to be, just a dull ache from knowing that he can’t have what he wants. Most of the time he can ignore it, especially when there is work to do. He and Ethan are back to being friends, and as long as Ethan doesn’t start hating him again, Will thinks he’ll be able to do this.


	9. Chapter 9

**Will’s POV**

 

The mission gets just a bit harder when they discover several extra layers of security while reassessing at the safe house. There’s not a huge rush to get the information, so they can take a couple of hours to plan at the unusually nice and spacious safe house, which is nice.

 

The extra security means that they kind of need a fifth person to help, but they can manage with four as long as they time things correctly. They don’t have to actually confront the billionaire who owns the building they are going into, they just need to get information off his computer in three completely different parts of the complex.

 

Benji is going to be breaking down the building security and monitoring the cameras for any surprises, Luther will be breaking through the firewalls of the computer so that Will can download supply sources from the east side of the building and Ethan can download building plans from the west side of the building and then make his way to the south corner to download plans on what the thing is going to be used for.

 

They’ve got about fifteen minutes to do it before they have to be out of the doors, which set off an alarm if they are open any longer, and Benji won’t be able to override that. They take thirty minutes to open because of all the security that resets when they close, so they’ve got to stay open unless Will and Ethan want to get trapped. But that definitely can’t happen, because once the doors close, the security system resets as well, and the infrared sensors will sense that there are two extra people in the building before Benji can work to override them.

 

They’ve got the timing all planned out by 10 P.M. and are just waiting for their go time at 12 A.M. when there is minimal security in the building. Will is feeling confident in their plan — he’s gone over it ten times and can’t find any holes in it. He’s actually pretty relaxed.

 

Then Ilsa walks in.

 

She comes in without warning, which gets her four guns pointed in her direction. Will feels his stomach drop when he realizes who it is. Ethan smiles his brilliant white smile, laughs and tells everyone to stand down as he walks over to hug her. The only reason Will puts his gun down is because Benji grabs it out of his hand and forces him to sit down.

 

Will nods his greeting at Ilsa when she makes eye contact with him, forcing himself to smile. Benji walks over to hug her before returning to Will’s side, sitting down and asking Will about the mission plan to give Will something else to focus on as Ethan and Ilsa catch up.

 

Jealousy is burning in Will’s throat as Ethan and Ilsa smile and laugh with each other and he’s ashamed of it. He’s tense in his chair despite Benji’s best efforts to calm him down. Will assumes that Ilsa will be joining the team as their fifth member to collect the information off the computer in the south wing, and that everything else will stay the same. He takes a deep breath and tells himself to get it together — her being here will only help them get in and out faster.

 

At first, as Ethan walks Ilsa over the plans, that’s how it goes. Ilsa agrees and they are going over the floor plan and her route when she suggests a change.

 

“Well, what if we just enter from the top?” she asks, “Then Benji doesn’t have to worry about the doors, just the infrared sensors.”

 

Ethan is about to agree when Will cuts in.

 

“We’ve still got to worry about the pressure sensitive floors in the hallways and rooms, which shut off when the doors open. Opening the doors will be quicker for Benji to do and will allow him to manage all of it under one control. If we don’t open the doors, he has to do them one by one and that leaves him less time to monitor the cameras for any guards. We’ll have plenty of time to get in and out.”

 

“But what will it take? Two minutes for Benji to shut it all down one by one? Probably even less. Then if the downloads go wrong, we won’t be pressed for time.”

 

“There’s no reason the downloads should go wrong — Luther already has all the firewalls down and he’ll start and unlock the computers before we even go in so they are ready.”

 

“Still, if the downloads take a long time—”

 

“I agree with Ilsa.” Ethan cuts in, and Will’s breath catches in his throat. He looks over at Ethan to find him staring Will down, eyes hard. “Just in case, it will be good to have more time.” He keeps staring at Will until Will nods.

 

“Okay,” he says, even though he feels like screaming. “Okay, we’ll do that.”

 

Ethan nods and looks back to Ilsa, smiling softly at her as they look back down to the plans. Will’s eyes sting as he looks back down at the plans, adding the changes and going over it for any holes. To him, it’s more logical and presents fewer “what-ifs” if they go with the original plan, but he doesn’t feel comfortable trying to tell Ethan that anymore.

 

He looks over at Benji and Luther who are both staring at him with pity, and Will just shakes his head at them and looks back down. The last thing he wants from anyone in this room is pity.

 

They are about thirty minutes from leaving when Will does actually find a hole in the plan. If the doors don’t open, the north side interior doors, which Will is now going out of while Ilsa and Ethan use the south windows, won’t unlock for him to get to the window he needs to get to, and it doesn’t look like Benji can override it without being inside the building. Ilsa isn’t currently in the room, so he feels comfortable enough to bring it up.

 

“Hey, Ethan,” he says, pointing at the plans. “If we don’t unlock the doors to go in—”

 

“For god’s sake, Brandt—” Ethan cuts him off roughly, rolling his eyes, “The plan is fine, just because it’s not yours doesn’t mean it won’t work. Stop looking for a way to prove Ilsa wrong.”

 

Will feels like he’s been slapped. That’s not at all what he’s been doing, and it hurts that Ethan thinks he’s that low. “No,” he says softly, shaking his head after a moment. “I’m not looking to prove her wrong. I just—”

 

“Yes, you are,” Ethan shoots back at him, standing up and raising his voice a little. “You haven’t said a word for three hours, just relentlessly going over the plans. There’s nothing wrong with them, I’ve gone over them too. Now cut it out—”

 

“Ethan, it’s just this one thing,” Will tries one more time, trying to get him to look at the computer, “I just noticed it, if we don’t open the doors—”

 

“We’re not opening the damn doors!” Ethan screams at him, causing Will to take a step backwards. “You’re so controlling, Will! Ilsa is just as smart as you, there’s no reason for us not to use her plan! You’ve never liked her; even after I _proved_ to you she was on our side! You have no reason not to trust her anymore, stop being so damn stubborn!”

 

If anyone else would have yelled at him like that, Will would have been already screaming back. But it’s Ethan, and all Will can do is stand there stunned, feeling like he’s going to cry. He can’t believe Ethan honestly thinks this low of him, and the pain of it is sharp in his chest, feels like a knife through his heart.

 

It’s been several moments since anyone has spoken, Luther and Benji stunned too as they stare between Will and Ethan. Will, realizing he’s not going to stop himself from crying, takes a deep breath and nods. “Sorry,” he says, looking down, “we’ll go with her plan.”

 

He barely gets it out before he excuses himself and rushes for the stairs, taking them in twos and then heading for the furthest bathroom, forcing himself to shut the door quietly and cross the room before he presses his back to the wall and slides down it, quiet tears already leaking out from behind his eyes.

 

Benji follows him in less than a minute later with his laptop, sitting on the edge on the tub. Instead of trying to comfort Will, which Will doesn’t want, he asks a question.

 

“What were you trying to tell him?”

 

It takes Will a moment to respond as he tries to regain his voice. “I—” he starts, taking in a shaky breath, “I just wanted to point out that if we don’t open the doors that you might not be able to open the north interior doors I need to go through to reach the window I need to go out of.”

 

Benji hums and opens his computer, looking over what Will said. He takes several minutes, trying different things as Will cries quietly and tries to calm down.

 

“First of all,” Benji says softly, “it’s good you pointed it out, because I didn’t notice that. I'll be able to get them open, but it’s going to take me a bit.

 

"Second of all, I want you to stay up here, because I’m about to go scream my head off at Ethan. I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with him. You’re going to ride with me and Luther in the van, because we’ll park outside the window you need to get in and out of. Ilsa and Ethan will go separately. I’ll send them ahead and then come get you.”

 

He shuts his computer roughly before stepping around Will and going out the door, shutting it behind him. Will doesn’t even try to stop him.

 

 

**Benji’s POV**

 

Benji has never been so mad with Ethan Hunt in his life. He cannot _believe_ what Ethan just did to Will, who had an _actual_ , _important_ problem to talk to Ethan about. A problem that would have affected Will, _not_ Ethan.

 

He practically crashes down the stairs and bursts into the room, making Ethan, Luther, and Ilsa, who has returned, all look at him in surprise before he sets down his computer and gets right in Ethan’s face. Ilsa is smart, so she heads for the door as Benji starts screaming. 

 

“ _What the hell is wrong with you_?” he hisses, pointing his finger in Ethan’s face. “First of all, you had _no reason_ to yell at him like that. It was completely unnecessary, and unbelievably rude! And to _accuse him_ of being so unprofessional that he was trying to _prove Ilsa wrong_? Because _he’s controlling_? And _stubborn_? News flash Ethan, but that’s not Will, that’s _you_.

 

 _“_ Furthermore, Will has zero reason to trust Ilsa! Especially because everytime she’s around, you treat him like shit! If there is one person on the face of this planet that Will is loyal to, it’s _you._ He would _never_ try to make a plan that’s not as good if it jeopardized you and the rest of this team just to prove a point. And it was absolutely _disgusting_ of you to imply that he would.

 

“He goes over missions for hours and hours _every time._ It’s who he fucking is, and you _know that_. And to round it all off, he had an actual point in trying to talk to you.” Benji reaches for his computer again and opens it up, shoving it in Ethan’s face.

 

“You see the north door that _you_ told Will he should go out of? It’s going to take me ten minutes to get them open because they lock if the main doors are shut. He wouldn’t have been able to get out. And because you didn’t listen to him, he could have gotten stuck or caught in the building and it would have been _your_ fault. You’re team leader, you’re supposed to listen to everything no matter what. And because of your damn ego you could have jeopardized Will’s safety.

 

“No one’s opinion matters to Will more than yours. You’re the one who convinced him he can do this — that he can be a field agent. Yet you just accused him of being so stubborn that it makes him a bad one.

 

“Your’s and Ilsa’s plan is probably going to work, Ethan. And it’s too late to change it now, because we should have already started opening the doors. But to be honest, I think the plan you and Will came up with _together_ is the safer option, and I know in the back of your mind that you do too. So you best hope that those doors open like they are supposed to, because there’s no going back now.”

 

Ethan stands there for several moments, stunned at Benji’s lecture. He looks over to Luther, who’s also looking at Ethan, face hard. Ethan takes a quick breath and looks back at the screen for a couple moments before handing Benji his computer back and stepping towards the stairs.

 

“I’m going to go talk with Will— ”

 

“No the fuck you’re not,” Benji interrupts, blocking Ethan’s path. “You’ve done enough, and we are going to be late if we don’t leave. You and Ilsa can get going now, the three of us will be right behind you.”

 

Ethan shifts uncomfortably, and Benji can tell he’s really hit Ethan where it hurts. Benji doesn’t think there is going to be any problems, and that’s the only reason he brings it up to Ethan like this without insisting that they should just wait a day.

 

“Benji, I can’t go into a mission— ”

 

“Knowing you made your teammate feel like shit?” Benji finishes, making Ethan flinch. “Knowing that Will could possibly get captured or hurt before you apologize? Well, you would have been just fine going into it three minutes ago. So you can live with it, and talk to Will later. Like I said, you better hope I can get those doors to unlock before a guard finds Will. It will be close, especially with the guard rotation. You and Ilsa should be clear the whole time, but he’s working against that clock, which you also failed to consider when you changed the plan. Now go.”

 

Ethan’s face falls and he look up the stairs for several moments before stepping back and grabbing a bag.

 

“Just— ” Ethan starts softly, trying to finds his words. “Just tell him I’m sorry, okay? And that I want to talk with him after, alone.”

 

Benji nods and turns back to Luther, raising his eyebrows at him.

 

“Was Will okay?” Luther asks in a hushed tone that carries so that he’s sure Ethan hears the conversation as he walks out.

 

“No, he was crying,” Benji not-so-whispers back, feeling satisfied when he sees Ethan stop dead in his tracks. “I’ll go get him now.”

 

Ethan turns around and takes a step back towards the stairs, but Benji stares him down until he shakes his head in distress and walks out the door. Benji waits a couple moments to make sure Ethan isn’t coming back before he heads upstairs to get Will.

 

He really hopes this mission goes how it’s supposed to.

 

 

**Ilsa’s POV**

 

Ilsa is currently sitting in the car waiting for Ethan, breathing a bit heavy. She scrambled down here when Benji told Ethan to go to avoid being caught having listened to that whole conversation.

 

Unease is tangling in her stomach as she thinks about what Benji pointed out to Ethan. If Will honestly had that much of a chance of getting hurt or captured going with her plan, then she doesn't see the point in continuing with it tonight. She doesn’t understand why Ethan agreed with her without checking this out. It seems very unlike him.

 

Ethan climbs into the car and starts it, and Ilsa notices the slight tremor in his hands before looking up at him. He’s breathing hard and his face is hard set, lines creasing his forehead. Ilsa doesn’t want to sell herself out- she knows she wasn’t supposed to hear that conversation. But Will’s safety is more important that her pride.

 

“Look, Ethan— ” she starts, trying to tread carefully. “If Benji is right and Will is in that much danger going into this— ”

 

“Just don’t,” Ethan says, cutting her off. He closes his eyes and grips the steering wheel tightly, breathing hard through his nose.

 

“Why did you even agree with me?” she pushes. “I’m just a guest, Will is actually a part of this team. And he’s very smart. If he’s in danger, we should pull out of the mission and wait for tomorrow. Maybe my plan isn’t the one we should go with.”

 

“Yes it is,” Ethan says back, short. “Your plan will work fine, don’t worry about it. It was my call in the end.”

 

“Fine, I won’t worry about it. But it still doesn’t make sense why you were so quick to jump to my defense. I’m still a guest here and— ”

 

“Don’t say that,” Ethan cuts her off, again, and now he sounds tired.

 

“Don’t say what? That I’m a guest of this team for this mission? That’s exactly what I am, Ethan.”

 

“Just let it go, Ilsa.”

 

“No, I won't. Will is your partner. His opinion should have been the important one-”

 

“Will is important!” Ethan says urgently, and it takes Ilsa by surprise.

 

“I didn’t say he wasn’t,” she says carefully, studying Ethan. “Ethan, is—is there something more to your and Will’s— ”

 

“No,” Ethan interjects harshly, putting the car into drive. “It’s time to go.”

 

Ilsa, knowing she just hit a nerve, just nods and sits back as Ethan pulls out. If she had to take a guess after that response, she would say that Ethan probably wishes there was something else with Will. But she thinks Ethan might kill her if she asked him about it, so she keeps quiet, watching the road as they make their way to the complex.


	10. Chapter 10

**Will’s POV**

 

“I’m inserting my drive now,” Ethan whispers through the comm. “Is all the security down?”

 

“It’s all good,” Luther confirms. “All three of you, go when you’re ready.”

 

“Inserting mine now,” Ilsa whispers.

 

“Me too,” Will says.

 

“Pluto,” Ethan says as Will starts the download. Pluto is Benji’s code name for the mission. “Do you have that door open?”

 

“No, not yet, working through the security on it. Why would this much security be on this one damn door?”

 

“When will it be open?” Ethan whispers back, and he seems on edge.

 

“I can’t say, hopefully in three minutes,” Benji says, “Saturn,” Will’s code name, “guard rotation in eight minutes.”

 

“Got it, thanks Pluto,” Will says, watching the download percent climb.

 

“If that door’s not open by the time my download is done, I’m coming to you, Saturn,” Ethan declares.

 

“No, that’s fucking stupid,” Benji immediately cuts in. “You’ll run into three guard rotations and five locked doors no matter which way you pick. Stick to the plan and go out the south window, I should have this open in a minute.”

 

Ethan makes an unpleasant sound but falls silent as the downloads complete.

 

“All done, heading for the exit,” Ilsa says first.

 

“Me too,” Will says. “Is the door open?”

 

“No, give me ten seconds, I’ve almost got it.”

 

“Guard rotation in three minutes,” Luther reminds him.

 

“I’m done,” Ethan says. “Pluto, do you have the damn door open?”

 

“Yeah, it’s open now. But hurry, Saturn. I had to pop it open so that it stays unlocked, and the guards can’t see that. It will take me just as long to get it open again if it shuts.”

 

“Got it, going now.”

 

Will slips the information into an inside pocket of his jacket and hurries down the hall quickly but quietly. He’s just five steps away when Luther whispers urgently into his ear.

 

“Guard ahead of schedule! Just on the other side of the door!”

 

Will immediately plasters himself to the wall on his side of the door, close enough to it that the guard won’t see him through the small windows. The door is open just a fraction, and Will silently prays that the guard won’t notice it.

 

He has no such luck. The guard pushes the door shut and Will flinches as Benji hisses, “Shit!”

 

“What?” Ethan hisses into the comm. “What is it?”

 

“Door is shut,” Benji says, panicked. “Fuck, Will, you’ve got to get out of there and find somewhere to hide; I need time to get this open.”

 

Will looks around quickly, evaluating his options, but Luther quickly cuts in.

 

“He doesn’t have time! He’s got guards coming at him from both directions!”

 

“Set off an alarm!” Ethan hisses into the comm, sounding like he’s running. “Call their attention somewhere else. Will, I’m coming! Just hold your ground!”

 

“Ethan, if I can’t get him out, I can’t get you in!” Benji hisses. “And the alarms are encrypted too! The door that you can go in is on the other side of the wing, and Will can’t get out of it which is why he’s going this way— ”

 

“Will, can you make it to the other door?”

 

“I can try,” Will says, immediately heading towards it. “I should be able to hold off two guards, anyway.”

 

“You aren’t dealing with two, you’re dealing with six— don’t turn there!”

 

It’s too late for Luther’s warning, though, and Will turns right into three guards, who stare at him for a millisecond before pulling out their guns.

 

“Fuck!” Benji screams.

 

Will turns around to run for it, but three more guards round the corner at the end of the hall, and he’s trapped. He turns back around to fight but he’s not fast enough, and all three of the guards shoot tranquilizer darts at him. Two hit.

 

“Shit!”  he cries, pulling them out and scrambling back, but he feels it almost immediately.

 

“Will, I’m coming!” Ethan screams, “I’m coming, just hang— ”

 

“I’m hit,” he says into the comm, tripping backwards over his own feet as the guards advance on him. He hits the ground hard but has just enough left to take his earpiece and microphone off and crush them so the guards can’t trace anything off them.

 

The guards reach him a second later and haul him up roughly, making Will’s head spin. He tries to move his limbs to fight back, but he doesn’t have control over them anymore. He doesn’t even make it through that stupid door before everything goes black.


	11. Chapter 11

**Will’s POV**

 

When Will comes to sometime later, barely conscious and extremely drowsy. He’s lying on a cold stone floor. His vision is blurry and he can barely move, but he thinks he can see bars in front of him. He supposes this is what it’s like the have a double dose of tranquilizer in you. He registers that he’s shivering, and the longer he stays awake, the colder he gets. It’s easy for him to slip back under, letting his world go black once again.

 

**Ethan’s POV**

 

Ethan has never been more upset with himself than he is right now as they try to track down where Will is. It’s his fault that Will got caught because Ethan didn’t want to listen to him. And Benji was right, Ethan  _ did  _ think that Will’s original plan was safer, but he was hoping that if they used Ilsa’s plan, she might want to join the IMF and their team. She would be a great addition, very valuable during missions. But there’s a thousand other ways to get her to consider that, and the way Ethan chose to do it might have just cost him Will.

 

Ethan shakes his head and grabs at his hair as they sit in the safe house, Benji and Luther both working away furiously on their computers. He should have pushed past Benji and apologized to Will before the mission. There was always a risk on missions that someone doesn't come back, they all know that. But this is Will. Ethan has always thought he was untouchable.

 

He fucking made Will cry because of what he said, and that might end up being the  _ last  _ thing Ethan said to him. Ethan doesn’t think he’ll ever get over that if it turns out to be the case.

 

When he can’t stand sitting anymore, he starts pacing the room. He refuses the food Ilsa offers him; he already feels like he’s going to throw up. It’s been an hour and a half since Will got caught, and every minute they don’t find him increases the chance that he’s dead.

 

Finally, almost two hours in, Benji finds him. In the basement of the same damn building Will got captured in. They immediately start looking into security and firewalls, trying to develop a plan.

 

They discover that the basement is the least guarded part of the building because temperatures are below freezing, which prevents most security systems from properly functioning, but also causes hypothermia. 

 

Ethan grabs several blankets to shove in the van along with their gear, and twenty minutes later they are back on their way to the building.

 

Ethan and Benji are going to go in and get Will. Luther is going to break down the much easier security and watch the guards. He shouldn’t have to worry very much about them, though, because Ilsa’s going distract them by going in the way she did last time and breaching the security box so she can set off every alarm in the damn place except for the basement.

 

Ethan and Benji get into the basement through the sewers. Once they’ve got Will they’ll go up the stairs and out the doors because the guards will be gone courtesy of Ilsa, but for now this is the best way to get in.

 

They only have to avoid one guard, and they fling themselves behind stone pillars to avoid being seen. He definitely hears them, though, and is walking in their direction when the alarms start blaring upstairs and he bolts for the stairs.

 

Ethan flies through the large basement full of empty prison cells, Benji hot on his heels. It takes them several minutes longer than Ethan would like but they finally,  _ finally  _ catch sight of Will lying motionless on the floor in a cell close to the stairs.

 

They rush to the cell and Benji picks the lock as Ethan looks Will over. He’s got several cuts and bruises on his face, but all of his clothes are still intact and he doesn’t look like he’s been shot, which Ethan had feared. The second Benji gets the door open, Ethan flings himself inside and turns Will over, making sure there are no bullet holes. Benji taps him and points at Will’s neck, where two red welts are rising on his collarbone.

 

“Tranq gun,” he whispers, and Ethan nods, relieved.

 

“Will?” he whispers frantically, shaking him a bit to try and get him to come to. Will is shivering, so Ethan hopes that he’ll wake up. “Will, wake up. Come on, we’ve got to get you out of here.”

 

Will’s eyes open, but they're glassy. He stares at Ethan for a moment before he moans softly and closes his eyes again.

 

“We don’t have time to wake him up,” Ethan says, getting an arm around Will and lifting him up so that he’s sitting, Ethan supporting all of his weight as his head lolls to the side. “Take an arm, we’ve got to move.”

 

They each sling one of Will’s arms over their shoulders, dragging him out of the cell and up the stairs.

 

“Luther, we’re coming. Will’s unconscious, we can’t wake him up. Are you by the door?”

 

“Heading there now,” Ilsa says back-- Ethan forgot she was driving.

 

“You guys should have no security, and the door should be unlocked. I’ve had all the security cameras shut down since eight last night; they won’t be able to track us,” Luther says, answering Ethan’s next questions before he even asks.

 

Thankfully, Luther is right, and they get Will out of the doors and into the truck without any fuss. They lay him out on the floor and Benji slams the doors shut. Ilsa pulls away as Ethan puts his hands on Will’s face and tries to wake him up again. His skin is ice cold.

 

“He has mild hypothermia,” Ethan announces, starting to unzip Will’s jacket. “We’ve got to get him warm. Hopefully he won’t have a concussion, but we won’t be able to tell until he’s conscious. How long does it take for a double dose of tranquilizer to wear off?”

 

“Several hours,” Ilsa says from the front, “He probably won’t wake until the late morning or early afternoon, and he’ll be groggy.”

 

Ethan nods. He gets Will’s jacket out from underneath him and hands it to Benji, who takes it. Something falls out of it and they both look down at it. It’s the stupid flash drive.

 

Benji quickly grabs it and hands it to Luther and helps Ethan start to cut Will out of his freezing clothes. When they get back to the safe house, they rush Will inside and get him up the stairs. Ilsa cranks the heat as Ethan and Benji get Will into a bed and surround him in blankets to help him get warm. They each take one of his hands and start warming his fingers up. Ilsa walks in and begins cleaning the cuts on his face.  

 

It takes a while, but Will starts warming up and stops shivering. Ethan lets out a sigh of relief. He looks over at the clock, groaning when he sees that it’s past four in the morning. Benji groans too, scrubbing a hand over his face. Ilsa walks back in the room, coming to check his process.

 

“He’ll be fine?” she asks, leaning against the wall.

 

“I think so,” Ethan says. “As long as he doesn’t have a concussion.”

 

Ilsa nods. “Good. Well, there’s food downstairs. Come and eat, it will be awhile before he wakes up.”

 

She turns to go and Benji gets up to follow her out, squeezing Ethan’s shoulder as he goes past.

 

Ethan stays behind for a moment, letting himself relax for the first time in hours. He’s still holding Will’s limp hand in both of his. He runs his thumb over the back of Will’s hand and looks up at his face. He looks calm and peaceful, sleeping against the light grey sheets with the soft light from the lamp on the nightstand falling across his face.

 

Ethan can’t help it  — he reaches up and cups Will’s cheek. He gently runs his thumb over the side of Will’s nose and under his eye. He thinks that Will presses into it for a moment, but shakes his head at thought. 

 

He stays there for a moment longer before standing up and tucking Will’s hands under the blanket and running a hand through his hair.

 

“I’m sorry, Will,” he whispers, running his thumb over Will’s forehead one last time before he steps out of the room. 


	12. Chapter 12

**Will’s POV**

 

The next time Will comes to, he is much warmer and much more comfortable. His eyes are still heavy, so he doesn’t attempt to open them, content to just bask in the sleepy haze he’s in for a little while longer. He registers that he’s lying on his side instead of his stomach like he was before, and he curls his fingers around a soft blanket and rubs his cheek against the pillow and sighs, ready to drift back to sleep.

 

He’s just barely conscious when he remembers what happened on the mission and he jerks awake, adrenaline coursing through his veins. He’s wrapped up like a burrito in blankets, and it seems like his brain and body are having trouble connecting because Will can’t move his arms like he wants to try and free himself.

 

It takes a moment for his eyes to clear, but once they do he sees someone lying next to him on the bed and he jerks back the best he can in his blanket prison, trying to get away.

 

His vision is still fairly blurry, but the person looks like a man. He’s got dark brown hair and white skin, and Will thinks he’s sleeping because he can’t see his eyes. He’s got a big forehead that his hair is falling over and  — wait, hold on. Will knows that face.

 

As his vision clears even more, he breathes out a sigh of relief. That’s definitely Ethan, which means Will is safe. As his heart rate slows down, Will assesses the rest of the room. It’s definitely a room in the safe house. The small window’s blinds are shut, but there’s still a bit of light coming through them, which means that it’s before noon because the window in this room is on the east wall.

 

He turns his attention back to Ethan, who’s still sleeping. His face is all scrunched up like he can’t relax, and his arm is outstretched towards Will, his hand inches away from Will’s own hand. It makes Will wonder if Ethan was holding his hand.

 

He’s still upset with Ethan and how he had yelled at Will before the mission, but Will also knows that the reason he’s alive, not seriously hurt, and warm is probably because of Ethan. He knows Ethan feels bad about what he did because he heard Benji yelling at him and Ethan’s responses. And Ethan had tried to come to him several times, not to mention asking about that damn door more than Will had. 

 

So Will definitely knows Ethan feels bad, but he’s still going to make him apologize for it. Will might be stupidly in love with him, but he will hang onto his dignity as long as he can. 

 

He’s still pretty groggy several minutes later, and he does want to go back to sleep, but his head is pounding and he’s thirsty and he needs to pee.

 

He groans and tries again to escape the blanket burrito, but his limbs still aren’t feeling strong enough for him to do it. He grunts and resigns himself to his fate, then starts squirming and grunting in an effort to wake Ethan up so he can unwrap Will.

 

It works, and less than thirty seconds later Ethan jerks awake, immediately reaching for Will.

 

“It’s okay, you’re okay. It’s me, you’re safe,” he mumbles, his hand finding its way to Will’s head and smoothing over his hair.

 

Will stops moving but it takes him several seconds to find his voice, and when he does he can’t get very much out.

 

“Bathroom,” he decides on, which is currently his most urgent need. It comes out sounding like a whine, and Will flushes.

 

“Yeah, yeah. Let’s get you up,” Ethan says immediately, unwrapping Will and then helping him sit up. He’s walking around the bed so that he can help Will stand, but Will decides he can do that on his own and gets up before Ethan can get to him. He’s very wrong.

 

His head throbs and his vision goes black immediately, and he feels himself starting to fall. He just registers Ethan’s hissed “Will!” before Ethan catches him and sits back down with him, Will ending up half in his lap and against his chest.

 

It takes several moments for his world to stop spinning, and when it goes his bladder hurts even more than it did before.

 

“  — can’t do that yet, Will , ” Ethan is saying softly next to his ear. “You had a double dose of a tranquilizer, it’s going to take a while before you aren’t groggy.”

 

Will groans and squeezes Ethan arm to try communicating that Will needs the bathroom  _ now.  _ Thankfully Ethan gets the signal and he manages to get them both up and helps Will to the bathroom, guiding him down to sit on the toilet. Will is definitely going to be embarrassed by this later, but right now he just needs to pee.

 

When they get back to the bedroom Ethan sits him down and helps him take a drink of water, and Will starts to wonder where he got the glass from, but it hurts his head, so he stops. He doesn’t have to ask for Aspirin before Ethan is holding it against his lips, which Will is thankful for because talking seems way too hard right now.

 

“You look like you’re going to pass out again,” Ethan says, leaning down to look in Will’s eyes, “But I’m going to try and check you for a concussion. How many fingers am I holding up?”

 

Will groans but focuses on Ethan’s fingers. He can tell he doesn’t have a concussion. “Two,” he makes himself say, his voice raspy.

 

“Good,” Ethan says, picking up a card from the nightstand. Will scrunches his nose at it  —  he knows that card. “Don’t make that face, it won’t take too long. Can you read the numbers from left to right for me?”

 

Will looks down at it and starts listing them off, having to stop every couple letters to clear his throat. He makes it through, though, and Ethan finally lets him lay back down.

 

Ethan covers him up with the blankets again before walking back to the other side of the bed and sitting down on it, reaching up and running his fingers through Will’s hair. Will sighs out at the feeling and closes his eyes, already half asleep.

 

“You have everything you need?” Ethan asks quietly, and Will nods. “Good. Will  — I know you’re almost asleep, and I’ll say it again later, but I’m sorry, okay? I’m sorry for everything I said and for not listening and getting you hurt because of it. I’m sorry.”

 

Will kind of feels like crying because he can hear the hurt in Ethan’s voice, how much he means what he’s saying. He takes a deep breath to keep himself together and nods again, hoping Ethan won’t leave now that he’s said what he wanted to.

 

“Okay,” Ethan says after a moment, and Will thinks his voice sounds kind of thick. “Can I stay here with you?”

 

Will nods again, grunting at Ethan when he pulls his hand away from Will’s head to climb under the covers. Ethan laughs softly, returning his hand to Will’s hair once he’s settled down.

 

“I’m right here,” he whispers, and the words might have made Will cry if he wasn’t already starting to drift off.


	13. Chapter 13

**Will’s POV**

 

Will slowly gets better over the next two days. The hypothermia wore off in the first two hours, but it takes forever to not feel like he’s moving through molasses because of the tranquilizer. Ethan keeps them all there for another two days after that to make sure Will is feeling 100% before they leave, just in case anything goes wrong.

 

Once Will regains enough strength to stay up for a couple of hours and actually eats something, Ethan sits him down in the living room (Luther, Ilsa, and Benji have mysteriously disappeared) so he can apologize again, and they end up having a two hour conversation where Will spills how scared he was while Ethan was on the run, and how little sleep he got and how much weight he lost.

 

Ethan starts looking sick about two minutes in, and Will wants to stop talking because it wasn’t Ethan’s fault, they both did what they had to do. But once he starts, he can’t make himself stop, like the sooner he gets it all out of his mouth the sooner the weight of it will lift from his shoulders.

 

Will may or may not start crying halfway through and Ethan may or may not come to sit next to him and pull Will into his arms and let him cry into his chest. Either way, by the end of it Will feels exhausted but much better, like a weight that has been sitting on his chest has finally been lifted off and he can breathe again.

 

He passes out there on the couch with his face still buried in Ethan’s chest and wakes up much later back in the bed that he and Ethan have been sharing since they rescued Will, Ethan sleeping by his side with an arm around him. Will lets himself bask in it while it lasts, knowing it will probably change once they get back home.

 

When Ethan finally deems Will fit enough to travel, they are back on a plane to Langley in hours, Will secretly a little bit happy that Ilsa parts ways with them at the airport, even though he’s significantly less jealous of her with how Ethan has stuck to his side for the past few days. Will may even be starting to like her by the time that they leave. Maybe.

 

He settles into his first-class seat next to the window, wondering how Ethan always manages to get them on nice planes on such short notice. He’s trying to ignore the small ache in his chest that’s starting to bloom, knowing that things are going to change when they land, when Ethan sits down next to him, smiling softly at Will and asking him if he likes the plane as he puts up the armrest in-between them.

 

Over the next week and a half, Will is constantly waiting for Ethan’s attention to turn back to normal while Ethan keeps persistently paying attention to him, getting in close to Will at every opportunity he gets, always throwing an arm around him or sitting so that their arms are touching. Will hasn’t driven himself to or from work since they’ve gotten back because Ethan insists on picking him up, and they always stop for dinner on the way home. The places get both increasingly out of the way and increasingly nicer as time goes on.

 

It’s two weeks later when Will starts thinking something might be up. Ethan’s attention keeps getting progressively more intimate, and one night as Ethan drops him off after dinner, he starts leaning over the console and Will practically screams “Night, thanks for dinner!” before falling out of the car and running up the stairs to his apartment. 

 

He corners Benji about it the next day at work while Ethan is in a meeting with Hunley. He can tell Benji didn’t say anything more to Ethan because of how surprised he is when Will says he thinks Ethan tried to kiss him the night before. He gets so excited he pushes past Will and hurries over to Luther and whispers in his ear just as Ethan walks in. Luther smirks and then raises his eyebrows at Will when Ethan puts an arm around him. Benji is grinning like an idiot and Will is blushing like one. Ethan ignores it all, which is confirmation that Ethan’s going for something here.

 

He doesn’t know how to feel about it. Did Ethan figure it out and is just trying to get some because he knows he can get it from Will? Later that day, he asks Benji this question and gets slapped upside the head for his trouble.

 

“You’re such an idiot. Ethan’s never been like that, and he’s definitely not doing it now. Also, if he just wanted to get some, he would have given up a week ago. He’s putting in way too much effort just to have sex.”

 

Will doesn’t appreciate being called an idiot, but Benji does have a point, which is why he hesitantly says yes when Ethan leans in close to him on Thursday and asks him if he wants to go to Cape Cod for a long weekend, just the two of them.

 

Will is nervous the whole plane ride there and all through dinner, his leg bouncing a million miles per hour under the table. Ethan grabs his hand and runs his thumb back and forth over it, trying to calm him down, but Will can’t get the butterflies out of his stomach.

 

They go for a long walk along the coast as the sun sets, which Will thinks would be a lot longer if he could calm down. Ethan seems to pick up the hint that Will isn’t going to, though, so he leads them back to their private rental house, and Will doesn’t get three feet in the door before Ethan gently backs him up into the wall.

 

“I’m going to kiss you, okay?” he whispers, cupping Will’s cheek, his eyes flicking between Will’s eyes and lips. 

 

Will makes a noise high in his throat that he meant to be a coherent ‘yes,’ but Ethan takes it as a yes anyway, and Will’s eyes flutter shut as Ethan’s lips meet his.

 

Ethan’s lips are soft under his, and the kiss leaves Will buzzing even though Ethan keeps it slow. 

 

The anxiety in his stomach fades away and is replaced by a warmth that Will recognizes as happiness, and he smiles into the kiss. Ethan smiles, too, pulling back to laugh a bit and bite his lip before he leans back in.

 

And, yeah. Will could probably get used to this. 


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is explicit, if you don't want to read that part skip to the end of the chapter to "Will's POV".
> 
> This is the last chapter, I hope you like it and that you enjoyed the story!

**Ethan’s POV**

 

William Brandt is a very, very stubborn person sometimes. What this means for Ethan is that it takes him another week to get Brandt in a bed.

 

Ethan gets it, though. Will wants to make sure Ethan is interested in him for  _ him,  _ not just his body, and Ethan is willing to wait as long as he must for Will to feel comfortable.

 

It comes one Saturday night after he and Will spend the night in at Ethan’s apartment. It’s been an hour since they’ve finished dinner and they’ve just been sitting closely on the couch, talking quietly and kissing. Ethan can’t stop thinking about how much easier all of this is with Will compared to anyone else.

 

They are doing considerably more kissing than talking at the current moment, and Ethan chances slipping his tongue out and running it over Will’s lower lip and is pleasantly surprised when Will groans and slides his tongue against Ethan’s, climbing into his lap.

 

Ethan rucks Will’s shirt up and gets his hands on Will’s skin, running his hands up Will’s back and over his side. Will jerks back suddenly and Ethan grabs onto him, scared he did something wrong.

 

“Ticklish,” Will explains, short of breath. His eyes are dark and it makes Ethan crazy.

 

“Sorry,” Ethan breathes out, smiling before he pulls Will up with him and starts walking him backwards towards the bedroom. “I’ll be more careful. Mind if we move this to the bed?”

 

“No, that’s fine,” Will says, turning around and walking himself there. Ethan laughs and shakes his head. He should have known Will wouldn’t let Ethan do anything for him.

 

Will walking by himself means that they get there quicker, though, so Ethan’s good with this compromise. He strips his shirt off and helps Will unbutton his, throwing both to the side before going for Will’s belt. Will goes for his after a moment of hesitation, and it makes Ethan stop.

 

“We don’t have to,” he says, wanting to make sure Will knows that. “We can wait, if you want to.”

 

“No, I want to,” Will responds immediately, blushing. “Just haven’t in awhile.”

 

Ethan smiles and resumes undoing Will’s belt. “Yeah, me neither,” he admits, kissing Will quick before sliding Will’s pants off and to the ground and then stepping out of his own. He gently pushes Will down onto the bed and climbs up over him, straddling one of Will’s legs.

 

Ethan leans down to kiss Will again before moving down to mouth at his neck, loving the way that it makes Will’s breath hitch as he rubs at Ethan’s arms. He nips at Will’s neck and then groans against Will’s skin when Will gasps and thrusts up against Ethan’s hip.

 

“You like it rough, don’t you?” Ethan whispers against Will’s skin and biting down a bit harder and pushing his hips down into Will’s. “Fuck, that’s hot, Will.”

 

“Will you get to it?” Will groans out, moving his hips up into Ethan’s again.

 

“What do you think I’m doing?” Ethan says, biting hard at Will’s collarbone where his shirt will hide the bite before moving his hands to Will’s waist and toying with the waistband of his boxers. “Can I take these off?”

 

“Yes, yeah,” Will pants out, arching his back so Ethan can work his underwear down over his hips. They both groan when Will’s cock pops free.

 

“Fuck,” Ethan whispers, moving down Will’s body. He bites at Will’s hip and then licks over it, humming at the way it makes Will hiss and arch. Ethan knees Will’s legs apart so he can get between them and nips his way down to the inside of Will’s thigh before moving to the other thigh and repeating his pattern, taking his time. He wants to learn every curve of Will’s body by memory.

 

“ _Ethan_ ,” Will hisses at him eventually, pushing his hips up to try and get Ethan where he wants him. “Come _on. Please_.”

 

“So impatient,” Ethan teases, nipping at Will’s skin one last time before moving up to his cock and licking at the head. He groans at the taste of Will on his tongue and wraps his hand around the base, dipping his tongue into the slit before running the flat of it down to the base and back up, then wrapping his mouth around the head and sucking at it lightly.

 

Will is letting out these soft moans with each breath and his hand has snaked its way into Ethan’s hair. Ethan moans around the head of Will’s cock and keeps it gentle and light, taking in how Will tastes and learning what he likes.

 

He sucks Will down further and moves his nails to Will’s hips, digging them into his skin and scratching them down. Will cries out but arches into it, chanting “More, more, more —  ” as he tightens his grip in Ethan’s hair and pulls.

 

Ethan pulls off and Will whines at him, but Ethan just smiles. “More?” he asks Will, who nods and tries to push Ethan down on his cock again. “Then be good, William. Now why don’t we see just how much you like pain, hmm?”

 

“I love it. Ethan, please. I haven’t had this in so long —  ”

 

Ethan hushes him, digging his fingers into Will's hips again and mouths at the head of his cock. He moves his fingers in towards the base of Will’s cock, leaving red tracks on his skin. Will’s hips are shaking under Ethan’s fingers already, but Ethan moves his fingers back to the top of Will’s hips and starts over again before he reaches his cock.

 

Will groans, trying to push Ethan’s head back onto his cock again. Ethan pulls back from where he’s mouthing at the head instead, and Will practically growls at him, the sound high and frustrated.

 

“What did I tell you?” Ethan asks him, stilling his fingers on Will’s hips as well. It takes Will a moment, but he swallows and then responds.

 

“To — to be good,” he breathes out quietly, chest heaving.

 

“That’s right,” Ethan says, rewarding Will by starting to move his fingers again. Will hisses and groans. “What do you say, if you want my mouth on your cock.”

 

“Please!” Will begs, voice high-pitched and breathless. “Please, Ethan, please suck my cock.”

 

“Good boy,” Ethan tells him, smiling against the head of Will’s cock before he wraps his lips around it and sucks hard. Will cries out again and arches into it, still begging Ethan mindlessly, and Ethan honestly cannot remember ever being so close to coming without touching himself.

 

Will is close and Ethan can tell, but he seems to need one extra push to reach his orgasm, and Ethan thinks he knows what it is. He sinks down on Will’s cock, taking it as deep as he can and holding himself there for a moment. When he starts to pull up he does so very slowly, placing the nail of his index finger just under his lips and dragging it along the underside of Will’s cock as he goes.

 

Will starts coming before Ethan can even get halfway back up, going still under Ethan and groaning out his name. Ethan moans and closes his eyes, pulling back to suck at the head and taste Will’s cum on his tongue. He has to press a hand to his cock to keep himself from coming in his boxers.

 

Ethan sucks Will through it and then pulls off, mouthing at Will’s hips with the occasional nip as he catches his breath. “Fucking hell, Will,” he whispers, unable to keep from palming himself now that he’s touched his cock. 

 

Will groans and pulls at Ethan’s arm. Ethan nips at his hip one more time before moving back up to Will’s mouth and kissing him hard, making sure Will gets a taste of his own come on Ethan’s tongue.

 

Will kisses back with just as much enthusiasm despite just despite Ethan sucking the actual life out of his dick and pushes at the waistband of Ethan’s boxers. “Off. Get them off,” he demands.

 

Ethan chuckles but hastily removes them, throwing them to the side. Will pulls him back down and he goes easily, settling back down on top of Will and kissing him again. Will wraps his legs around Ethan before turning his head to spit in his hand. He reaches down to wrap a strong hand around Ethan’s cock and starts stroking it, getting it slick with his spit. Ethan groans low in his throat and drops his head to Will’s shoulder, squeezing his eyes shut against how good it feels. Will starts kissing at the side of his head and his ear and Ethan could come just like this, but Will has other ideas.

 

“Come on,” he whispers in Ethan’s ear, angling Ethan’s cock down between his cheeks. “Fuck my thighs, Ethan. Come on.”

 

Ethan goes cross-eyed and thrusts down, groaning loudly into Will’s shoulder before biting down on it. It’s a bit too dry but it still feels fucking amazing, and Ethan groans out with every thrust down as his cock catches on Will’s hole. With Will whispering filthy nonsense into his ear, Ethan is done in minutes, coming all over Will’s hole and moaning into his neck.

 

Will is rubbing his head and neck gently, occasionally kissing the side of Ethan’s head, and it takes Ethan several minutes to convince himself to move. Eventually he forces himself to get up and he walks to the bathroom, wetting a washcloth with warm water and cleaning himself before he goes back into the bedroom and kneels between Will’s legs, wiping his cock down. He edges Will’s thighs apart again and groans softly at the sight of his come between Will’s cheeks, running his thumb through the streaks of white and over Will’s hole.

 

Will whines at him and bats at Ethan’s arms, so Ethan gently moves the cloth between his cheeks and wipes away the mess, tossing the cloth aside when he’s done; they can clean up in the morning. He forces a sleepy Will under the covers and switches off the light before climbing in beside him and wrapping his arms around Will possessively. He presses a small kiss to Will’s shoulder and closes his eyes, smiling softly as he drifts off to sleep.

 

 

**Will’s POV**

 

Will wakes up the next morning feeling well rested and very content. The morning sun is warm on his face and Ethan is warm where he’s pressed into Will’s side, still breathing steadily in his sleep with his face pressed into Will’s shoulder. Will turns his head to kiss Ethan hair, smiling so hard the corners of his eyes crinkle when Ethan sighs softly into his skin.

  
And, yeah. Will can  _ definitely _ get used to this. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's the end, I hope you liked it!

**Author's Note:**

> Visit/chat with me on Tumblr! My url is MissionBrandt :)
> 
> Please please leave comments and tell me what you think! I would love to hear from you guys.


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